Chao-zu 

Nipples gone erect, I'm wondering why

I jerked off in bed at all

The old fat ladies ass clouds up my window

And I can't see at all

And even if I could, it would all be wrinkled

But your naked picture on my wall

It reminds me that being gay is not so bad, not so bad.

Nipples gone erect, I'm wondering why

I jerked off in bed at all

The old fat ladies ass clouds up my window

And I can't see at all

And even if I could, it would all be wrinkled 

But your naked picture on my wall

It reminds me that being gay is not so bad, not so bad.

Dear Tien, I humped your leg but you still aint callin'-

-me a stupid Muppet, as I am just an annoying clown who feels your bottom

I felt the two things in your pants, I can't remember what you call 'em

They're probably mini-dragonballs or somethin'

Sometimes I squeeze them too tight when I feel 'em

But anyways, fuck it, you're to ugly to ever use 'em and have a daughter

But then again, I must say that I am too, I might go ask my friends father-

-if I can have his daughter, maybe adopt her

I'll name her three eyed twat

I read about your pet cat too, I'm sorry

I had a pet kill itself over some bitch that didn't want it

I know you probably hear this everyday, but you have got three eyes

I even notice when the pupil in it diolates, it looks kinda like King Kai's. 

I got a room full of your naked posters and your pictures man

I like the porno you made with Goku too, that shit was phat

Anyways, I hope you get this man, hit me back

Just to have gay relations, truly yours, the guy who belongs in a zoo

This is Chao-zu.

Nipples gone erect, I'm wondering why

I jerked off in bed at all

The old, fat ladies ass clouds up my window

And I can't see at all

And even if I could, it would all be wrinkled 

But your naked picture on my wall

It reminds me that being gay is not so bad, not so bad.

Dear Tien, you still aint pulled or scored, I hope you have a chance 

I aint mad, I just think it's fucked up that you wont shag fans

If you didn't want to kiss me outside, when I was being a flirt

You didn't have to, but you could have posed nude for Matthew

That's my little, imaginary friend man, he's only 8 years old

We waited outside, butt naked in the blistering cold for you   

for hours, and you just zipped up your trousers and said "no".

That's pretty shitty man, you're like his fucking idol

He wants to fuck you more than I do

I aint mad though, I just don't like you going straight now

Remember when we met in Denver, you said that if I kiss you 

You'd kiss me back - See, I'm gay like you used to be in your own special way

I never loved girls neither

One used to seduce me every day, but I always pushed her away and beat her

I can relate to why your posing nude in your photos

So when I have a shitty day, I drift away and stare at them, until my eyes weigh a ton

And I fall asleep, and dream about nothing but you, who else? No one, but you, cause you help turn me on when I'm depressed

I even got a condom with your endorsement, it's the best

Sometimes I pose myself, to fulfill my manly needs

It's like adrenaline, the nudism is like a sudden rush to me

See, everything you pose for is real, and I respect you for it

My gay partner is jealous cause I talk about you 24:7

But he isn't as good looking as you Tien, no one is

He don't know what it was like for people like us wearing pink, then getting beat up

You gotta shag me man, I'll be the best looking partner that you'll ever lose

Sincerely yours, Chao-zu

PS - We should be together too.

Nipples gone erect, I'm wondering why

I jerked off in bed at all

The old fat ladies ass clouds up my window

And I can't see at all

And even if I could, it would all be wrinkled 

But your naked picture on my wall

It reminds me that being gay is not so bad, not so bad.

Dear-Mister-I'm-too-good-to-kiss-or-shag-my-lovers

This'll be the last love letter I ever send your cute little ass

It's been six months now, and not kiss - I don't deserve it?

I know you got my last two dildos, I wrote the addresses on 'em perfect.

So this is my erotic sex toy, I hope you enjoy it

I'm in the hospital right now, lining up for my operation, which will mean I'll be neither straight nor gay

Hey Tien, I just drank a glass of orange juice, ya dare me to converse with some fisty cuffs wives?

Hey, ya know that song by the village people - YMCA?

Known for playing in gay clubs with gay people?

This is kinda like how this is, you could have taken me to a gay club

But now I'm nearing the operation room, and I'm no longer feeling horny

And all I wanted was a lousy shag or even a kiss

I hope you know that I lined up all your pictures and let lose on them with a piss

I love you Tien, we could have been gay together, think about it

But you ruined it now, I hope you can't get hard, and you always dream about it

And when you dream, I hope you can't sleep, and you do a poofy high pitched scream about it

I hope your conscience eats at you and you can't wear pink without me

See Tien....*Screaming* Piss of bitch, I'm trying to write

Hey Tien, that's the nurse injecting the anesthetic into my hand

But I aint gonna kill her, I aint like you

Cause then I wont be circumcised all the way, and have the base of it cut off too

Well, gotta go, my eyes are drowsy now

Oh shit, I forgot, how am I meant to cum on this shit now

{*Panting*}{ *Panting slows*}

{*Snoring*} {*Screeching of operation chair wheels*}

Nipples gone erect, I'm wondering why

I jerked off in bed at all

The old, fat ladies ass clouds up my window

And I can't see at all

And even if I could, it would all be wrinkled 

But your naked picture on my wall

It reminds me that being gay is not so bad, not so bad.

Dear Chao-zu, I meant to ask you out sooner, I just been busy

You say your going to adopt your friends fathers daughter, how old is she?

Look, I'm really pissed off that you'd dare call your daughter that

But here's an autographed nude photo for your imaginary friend

I wrote it in my ass' gap

I'm sorry I didn't shag you at the show, I must have missed you

Don't think that I did that shit intentionally just to avoid a kiss with you

But what's that shit about you saying you like to pose nude too?

I get paid lots of money for that, but what about you?

No money I bet, so how does that benefit you?

You got some issues Chao, I think you need a new bum chum, or maybe counseling

To help your ass from being lonely, and in need of a bumming when you're down some

And what's this shit about us meant to be together?

That type of shit make me want to pull down my trousers, and come over so we can meet each other

I really think you and your gay partner need each other

Or maybe you just need to bum him better

I hope that you get to masturbate over this letter, I just hope that it reaches you in time

Before you lose any of your sacred parts, I think that you'll be doing just fine

If you relax a little, I'm glad that I turn you on Chao-zu

But why are you so mad? Try to understand that I do want you as a bum chum

I just don't want you to do some crazy shit

I seen this one shit on the news that just made me sick

Some dude was depressed and had his dick cut off

And his bum chum was at home with his adopted daughter

And in his hospital bed they found a letter, but they didn't say who it was to

Come to think of it, his name was........it was you

Damn!