DBZ
Pensioners
The
heavy clouds pass over the night sky, with the prospect of rain
looming on. A quaint, well-decorated house is standing firmly; ready
to take on anything that hits it. Sitting in there are four men, four
old men at that. Each one has a beard of at least a foot in length,
and each man is as bald as a coot. They are on their rocking chairs,
with blankets on their laps, smoking their pipes, and ranting about
what the rules were when they were younger.
Kids run along outside, shouting and playing, and generally having a
good time. One kid throws his ball into the air, but it pops before it
lands in his hands again. The kid turns round, and sees one of the old
men with his hand outstretched, laughing to himself. This is the story
of the Z soldiers', after retirement.
Vegeta is laughing to himself after bursting the kids' ball, thinking
that he is really funny. He strokes his beard a little, and then
starts to shout at the kids to get off his land. Scared, the kids run
for their lives, making Vegeta laugh even more. The grandpa-saiyan
turns round, and uses his zimoframe to get himself over to his rocking
chair. He takes a seat, and starts to slowly rock; smoking his pipe,
and puffing the smoke into the air.
"Vegeta" grandpa-Goku muttered. "You really gotta stop
bothering those kids!"
A long pause ensues, while Vegeta takes out his false teeth, and
washes them out a little. He puts them back in, and chatters them to
make sure that they are functioning properly.
"Shut up......" Vegeta shouted, trying to think of the next
word. "What's your name again sonny?"
"Bob" Goku replied.
"Oh yes, I remember now. Bob, shut up." Vegeta snapped.
"Anyway, these kids don't get any discipline now-a-days. Back
when I was a kid, we were forced to do all of our chores before we
could go out, and even then we would never make as much noise as
these. We were taught proper respect back in my day! If we went round
shouting and skipping around like these kids, we'd get the cane!"
"Here, here" Krillen agreed. He had the shortest beard of
the lot of them. He was reading a paper, which dated ten years back.
"Did you know that Son Goku saved the world yesterday?"
"Who's Goku?" asked Goku and Vegeta at the same time.
"Goku is the little kid you fools" Piccolo exclaimed.
"He was the one who beat Cell"
"Wasn't that Go...Goh...Goha..." Goku said, unable to finish
the word.
"Who cares" Vegeta shouted. "Anyway, as I was saying,
these kids have no respect for us anymore, we have got to do something
to put them back in their place!"
"How about we force them to listen to one of your speeches
Veggie?" Piccolo laughed.
"Shut up! And don't call me Veggie! Everyone knows that my name
is....is.....fine, call me Veggie then." Vegeta grunted.
"So what are you guys doing tomorrow" Krillen asked.
"Sitting around complaining about these youngsters
now-a-days" Vegeta answered.
"I'm going to save the world!" said Goku excitedly.
"Shut up Bob, you know that you can't even beat Krillen anymore!
Anyway, I'm going to set a new memory record, my previous best
was.......damn, I forgot" Piccolo said, bursting out with
uncontrollable laughter. Everyone looks at him like he is an idiot,
and they all sigh.
"Hey green man! I could kill the bald dufus!" Goku shouted,
after realizing that he had been insulted.
"I'll kick you round the floor sonny Jim!" Krillen
countered.
"Don't you know anything baldie? His names Bob" Vegeta
scoffed.
"As apose to what?" Krillen asked.
"Jim" said everyone else at the same time.
"Oh....who's Jim?" Krillen thought out loud. Everyone slaps
their heads with their hands, pretending not to know Krillen.
"Anyway Goku, weren't you gonna prove that you are stronger than
me?"
"Yeah, let's go Mr-I-like-to-eat-youngster-food!" Goku
shouted, using a rather weak insult, but angering Krillen all the
same. He gets up, and the two struggle over to meet each other in the
middle of the room. They punch incredibly slowly, with every single
one of their punches stopping before they made contact, due to them
being so much out of breath. In the end, they both fall to the floor,
holding their hips in pain, as if they have just broken.
"Losers" Vegeta and Piccolo said together.
"Anyway, as I was saying, youngsters now-a-days......"
Vegeta started, as the whole scenario was about to start all over
again.
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