Poems
By Ray Connell
Goku
I wouldn't call him a retard
but it's really kinda hard
to tell what's going through his head.
If he attempts to open up his mouth
and let a word of argument come out
you can bet his status will be, dead.
Gohan
Piccolo gave him skills
he acted like a wussy still
then 4 years would eventually pass.
But at 11 he fought cell
and sent him straight to Hell
and totally whipped his candy-ass.
Chi-Chi
She's the strongest of them all
it's like she's gotten by the balls
what she says, they do.
Cause if you want to have stitches
fuck with strongest of the bitches
and I promise you'll be split in 2
Piccolo
Wears a turban like Apu
won't admit it, but it's true
and he's green just like the grass.
As sure as the Earth will twirl
he'll be pissed of at the world
mainly from not getting any ass.
Krillen
Bald head bounces like a ball
he's standing at 3' tall
when Nappa tried to grab his nads.
But Vegeta said, "Don't touch it
!"
how could he, say such shit
he made Nappa really mad.
Vegeta
An inevitable homosex
likes to stand around and flex
and wears a pink shirt to a battle.
But if Bulma is who I woke up to
I'd want to be gay too
I guess Yamcha will have to mount her
saddle.
Trunks
I know a fact he can't stand
is he was born of a one night stand
of Bulma and the prince of Saiyans.
He could have never imagined but
his mom is a cheap-ass slut
and his dad's a raging gay man.
Bulma
Listen to her bitch and holler
she'll perform for a dollar
and her power level's .03.
But you gotta watch your back
cause she'll smoke up all you crack
and your likely to get an S.T.D.
Yamcha
Compaired to Goku he's a wimp
so he works as a pimp
hookin playas up for the night.
He may still dress the same
and that suit may still be lame
but you gotta say his haircut sure looks
"tight"
Tien
You know him, he's Tien
he sees things in three and
every attack is in tri.
He can fight without you till
and chances are Choa-zu will
poke him in his third eye.
King Kia
Every day it's the same
telling jokes that are lame
making other people be a suckup.
Bubbles and Gregory are sick
cause King Kia's jokes suck a dick
and they wish he'd just shut the fuck
up.
Frieza
His name sounds like a kitchen appliance
to his father, he holds an alliance
whose name happens to be old King Cold.
His father is a laser tester
and a convicted child molester
so he attacks Frieza's bunghole.
Ginyu Force
5 dorks without a clue
the leader is Capt. Ginyu
along with Berter, Racoom, Golga, and
Jaise.
Just kick them all in the balls
and slam them up against the wall
and put those punk ass bitches in their
place.
Dodoria
Pufferfish colored pink
prone to fight and not to think
found vegeta and got beat up.
The move that was the best of all
was the attack on his testicles
maybe he should have worn a cup.
Zarbon
Doesn't really have a choice
has to use Paul Hogan's voice
which gives him that Australian kind of
word.
He thinks he's pretty, but he's not
he looks like a pile of snot
all I can do is flip the bird.
Master Roshi
Dirty, old, lonley man
watches porno when he can
but when it comes to scoring, he is out.
You can tell he's old as dirt
by looking at that lame-ass shirt
he don't know what being a playa is
about.
Oolong
Perverted pig ( Roshi 2)
looking for someone to screw
to say he should grow a set isn't crass.
But being he has no chance
better keep it in his pants
cause Bulma will go Loretta Bobbit on
his ass.
Puar
Car ornament or stuffed toy?
Is it a girl or boy?
I can't really tell, it's way too small.
Maybe it's a Shuriken star
stolen from some freakin bar
I just can't figure it out at all.
Koowi
This Koowi guy looks like an eel
sure to be in someone's meal
still wearing that saiyan armor suit.
But remember, before you start
remove his infected rectum parts
cause somewhere in there is Vegeta's
boot.
Bulma's mom
Natural blonde, that's a fact
how you can tell, the way she acts
could there be a bigger bimbo I ask you?
But wait, here's Marin
in the back of a Maclerin
I guess a bimbo's hair can be blue.
Turtle
Slow and steady like a tortouise
Watch out! It's coming towards us.
Quick! Send him for a loop-de-loop.
Should I chop off the head er ?...
Dress myself up like The Shredder?
Then we'll all have some turtle soup.
Android 16
Big and bulky, strong as Hell
at one time was strong as Cell
but then Cell became complete.
Tried to attack, but now he's dead
when Cell stepped on his head
and crushed it worse than Frosted
Shredded Wheat
Android 17
Wears a scarf like you know who
that homo Fred from Scooby-Doo
maybe thats why he drove a van?
Dr. Gero, it wasn't right
to make his pants that tight
especially since he is a man.
Android 18
Has Krillan totally whipped
Oops! I let that slip
Now it's out for all the world to hear.
But if I were in his shoes
I'd get some from an android too
and use my human "tool"
to fix her geers.
Android 19
Can't understand a single word
it's like talking to a bird
or better yet, like talking to a cat.
Dr. Gero's only question
is probably the best one
" Why the Hell'd I program him
like that?"
Android 20
He is without a doubt
gayer than that short and stout
android numbered 19, see?
If 17 and 18's lives were useful
instead, of course, of being abuseful
then they might not have killed him and
gotten free.
Cell
First a cricket, then a fish
finally human, got his wish
then held a tournament called the Cell
games.
By the way there was this
bloke
Hercule, man what a joke
his performance in it was real lame.
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