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The DBZ Olympics
AKA: The result of a kangaroo pouncing on me and telling me to "represent Sydney, yo".

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<That annoying Olympic music plays in the background as the announcer speaks>

Announcer:  "You've tuned in to the Dragon Ball Olympics: 2000!  And now, here is your master of ceremonies, arriving by jet plane right now!"

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ZOOOOOOMMM!

Announcer:  "The MC for the Olympics is none other than the man who won the most gold medals last year....."

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Announcer: "....MISTER SATAN!!!!'

Mr. Satan: "OHOHOHOHOHO!  The World Champion and master Olympian has arrived!  Now, let us begin the Parade of Nations!"

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Mr. Satan:  "Well, we only have one nation represented.  All the other countries dropped out when they saw who would be competing.  Team Japan!  As you can see, this year we have a circus theme!"

Z-Gang:  "Yeahhh, woohoo!  We're #1, we're #1!"

Mr. Satan:  "Leading the team is Captain Son Goku!   He's the doofus riding on the first car of the train."

Goku:  "I'm the conductor of the train! Wheeee!   *blows the horn*"

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Mr. Satan:  "There you  have it!  The, uh..rather short Parade of Nations.  Right now, we're about to go into the torch lighting ceremony, but first, here's a short documentary about how the Olympic Committee decided who would have the coveted job of actually lighting the torch."

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<cut to video tape of the Olympic Committee>

Trunks:  "As you all know, we're doing an elaborate torch lighting ceremony this year."

Gohan:  "Meaning, whoever lights the thing will be getting involved in something that could be potentially deadly."

Piccolo:  "So.....that means...."

Goku:  "...we should find someone useless and expendable to light the torch, just in case something bad happens!  I know just the person!"

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Goku:  "Yoohoo, Goten!  Come over here!  How would you like to light the torch at the DBZ Olympics?"

Goten:  "WHAT, you want ME to do it!?  What an honor, dad!  Thank you so much! I'd be happy to do it!"

Trunks, Gohan and Piccolo:   "Hehehehehehehehehehehehehe...."

Goten:  "What are you guys laughing at?"

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<end of video tape>

Mr. Satan:  "And now, Son Goten shall light the torch!   The idea is that he'll ride this bus up the ramp, and then light the big golden Goku statue."

Goten:  *gulp*  "Umm...how come I only found out the method of lighting this thing NOW?!  I've changed my mind!  I don't wanna do it!"

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Mr. Satan:  "But think of your country, your pride...and all the hot babes you'll score if you do it!"

Goten:  "Hey...that's right!  Ok!  In the name of cute chicks everywhere, I shall light the torch!"

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Mr. Satan: "Alrighty, launch the bus!"

<the bus goes flying, and hurls Goten towards the statue>

Goten:  "You $@#!$@$@#%^#$@!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

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<begin No-Budget Special Effects>

Mr. Satan:  "He did it!  The torch has been lit!   What a beautiful sight!"

Goten:  "I'm burning, BURNING!!!  Oh the humanity!!!  My gorgeous bod is now tarnished!"

Audience: "Ooohhhhhhh!!  Aaaahhhh......"

Mr. Satan:  "With the lighting of the Olympic torch....LET THE GAMES BEGIN!!!!"

Yes, let them games begin right here!

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