THE NIGHT VEGETA WAS SANTA
by Koga

'Twas the night before Christmas and all through the Capsule Corp. house,
not a creature was stirring, except Bulma's spouce.
Vegeta brushed his teeth and got ready for bed
while the thought of a new spandex suit was stuck in his head.
Bulma was asleep, you can tell by the snoring
after 7 times today, Jimmy Stewart gets boring.
Vegeta crept quietly --- to bed is where he rushed
he would try to go to sleep, while the whole world was hushed.
Then he herd a noise, arose such a clatter
he jumped out of bed to see what was the matter.
"What the Hell?" Vegeta yelled "Thats too loud to be a mouse!!
huh? I was Right!! Thats Kakarott on my house!!!!"
"A bag to steal my money and a fake beard, HOW PASSE!!!!
And whats that near the gutter? Its his getaway sleigh!!!!!!"
"How should I take him out? Final Flash should do the trick,
and with Kakarott out of the way, I can wait for St. Nick."
And without a second to spare, and with nary a pause,
Vegeta mistakenly pierced a hole through ...... Santa Claus.
Santa knew Vegeta was strong but as smart as a gnat
He was protecting Bulma and Trunks, Santa couldnt fault that.
"Vegeta, im angry -- of that there is no doubt!!
Its Christmas Eve, dumb ass, and Santa's now out!!
You pierced a hole in my stomach and you blasted off my arm
now all thats a very good reason for alarm!!!
And without my right arm, my bag I cant lift!!
So Im making you give each kid a gift."
"ME?!! Doing your job?!!! Well, How much does it pay?
Do i have use that gay-looking sleigh?"
"Its just something you will do for all the good kids in bed,
now GET IN MY OUTFIT OR I WILL BUST YOUR FAT HEAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Santa's red coat is what Vegeta would wear
and Santa's red hat would take the shape of Vegtea's freaky hair.
Vegeta got in the sleigh, and rode off into the night
But he never got any of the Reindeers names right!!!
"On Meli, on Haze, on Koga, on Rose ---
Wait!! Wheres that gay reindeer with the glowing red nose?"
So Vegeta went on and fulfilled Santa's request
and gave everyone the gift they loved best.
For Piccolo, the Namek, Vegeta gave him a jug of water
so he is refreshed when has villains to slaughter.
Goku's second son Goten fell asleep waiting for St. Nick.
He used Big Bang on the cookies and destroyed them quite quick.
He had to admit when he saw his son's friend napping
"Hey this kid is kinda cool, when his mouth isnt flapping!!!!"
Chi Chi, Goku's wife, a camera went her way
so she could watch her children 24 hours a day.
Gohan got Hooked on Phonics, they came in good timing
they would work so good, even CHI CHI wouldnt be whining.
Then Vegeta perfomed a task that was so brave and bold,
he gave lumps of coal to Frieza and King Cold.
The same thing he did for Buu and Cell
then as he left he said "I will see you all in Hell!!"
The other fighters got presents too
they were as useful as a pound of poo.
"Where are OUR presents?" "Oh those."
When they opened their presents, they were all clothes.
Master Roshi his present was one of my fears
his present was pornography of Brittany Spears!!!
Vegeta circled the globe in one evening,
trying to match rightly the gifts he was leaving.
From Egypt, to England, from Asia to Dunkirk
he said "How the hell does he stay a fat ass? Man, this shit is hard work!!!"
At the end of the list with but one gift to deliver
Vegeta realized something that just made him shiver.
"OH SHIT!!!!!! I blew it!!!!! What a dumb thing to do!!!
I gave Bluma's and Trunks's gifts to the wrong person but WHO?!!!!!"
Knowing no gifts would make his family miffed
but he heard Bulma say "What a great gift!!!!!
The gift says its from Santa but I know very well
this ring is from my Vegeta and its real dimondelle!!"
Trunks said "Its a Little Bastard's Mischief Kit!!!!!!"
like the one Bart Simpson had is what he would get.
"Thank you daddy!!!!" said Trunks with glee,
then Vegeta kicked him and said "Get off of me!!!!"
And there, on the table, in red and green wrapping,
was a present from Santa, despite the attacking
TWO gifts for Vegeta?!! What wonders would not cease?
He got that new spandex suit and a brand-new mouthpeice.
But attached was a note that would fill Vegeta with fear .....
"Merry Christmas Vegeta, round 2 is next year!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

the end!!!!